Victims of verbal assault on campus need to speak up
By Nita Shippy
Issue date: 11/6/09 Section: Opinion
On the evening of Tuesday, Oct. 21, I scrambled to finish a midterm essay in the library.
I was positioned next to a talkative man and his friend while they worked on a group project.
I listened to them discussing the details of the assignment as they proceeded to refer to their teacher using the derogatory word "c***," as if sexual orientation has anything to do with an instructor's grading process.
Rolling my eyes, I continued to type furiously on my computer, trying to finish my assignment and leave as soon as possible.
Suddenly, the boy sitting closest to me voiced loudly, "That's right, close your legs.I thought I smelled something."
My brain just couldn't compute.
Did he just say that?
Who was he talking to?
I couldn't tell if he was looking at the girl sitting directly across from me, or one of the girls sitting on the other side of the room.
His friend appeared just as startled as I was.
"What?" I asked.
"She had her legs open," he said. "I told her to close them. I could smell something."
"Do you know her?" I asked.
"No, I'm just an asshole," he said.
I couldn't see the face of the woman across from me, so I couldn't make out her expression.
I just kept thinking: They have to know each other.
This has to be some kind of joke. He couldn't possibly be saying this right in front of her and everyone else within earshot.
An awkward moment followed and then the men's conversation turned to other topics. When they left, I stood up and looked at the woman who was the victim of the verbal assault.
"Was that guy talking to you when he said that?" I asked.
"Yeah, he was such a jerk," she said.
"You should have yelled at him, or verbally accosted him," I said.
I tried to laugh as I made this pseudo-sarcastic quip, trying to brush off the awkwardness of the situation.
But after this altercation, I'm mostly just angry.
I was positioned next to a talkative man and his friend while they worked on a group project.
I listened to them discussing the details of the assignment as they proceeded to refer to their teacher using the derogatory word "c***," as if sexual orientation has anything to do with an instructor's grading process.
Rolling my eyes, I continued to type furiously on my computer, trying to finish my assignment and leave as soon as possible.
Suddenly, the boy sitting closest to me voiced loudly, "That's right, close your legs.I thought I smelled something."
My brain just couldn't compute.
Did he just say that?
Who was he talking to?
I couldn't tell if he was looking at the girl sitting directly across from me, or one of the girls sitting on the other side of the room.
His friend appeared just as startled as I was.
"What?" I asked.
"She had her legs open," he said. "I told her to close them. I could smell something."
"Do you know her?" I asked.
"No, I'm just an asshole," he said.
I couldn't see the face of the woman across from me, so I couldn't make out her expression.
I just kept thinking: They have to know each other.
This has to be some kind of joke. He couldn't possibly be saying this right in front of her and everyone else within earshot.
An awkward moment followed and then the men's conversation turned to other topics. When they left, I stood up and looked at the woman who was the victim of the verbal assault.
"Was that guy talking to you when he said that?" I asked.
"Yeah, he was such a jerk," she said.
"You should have yelled at him, or verbally accosted him," I said.
I tried to laugh as I made this pseudo-sarcastic quip, trying to brush off the awkwardness of the situation.
But after this altercation, I'm mostly just angry.
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Viewing Comments 1 - 2 of 2
Karla Fonner, Bridge Project
posted 11/06/09 @ 10:58 AM EST
Nita,
thanks for your article. My name is Karla and I work at the Women's Center on campus. You're right we all do have a stake in this. We all should speak up anytime someone is disrespecting us or we see someone being disrespectful of another person. (Continued…)
anonymous
posted 11/08/09 @ 10:05 PM EST
That's completely disgusting and immature of that person. Who, at the college level, still acts like that???
I am embarrassed for the immaturity and stupidity of that person. (Continued…)
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